Saturday, March 8, 2008

Can A Man Be Two and Be Happy?

I ask this question for a fairly simple reason. I have, to a limited degree, resolved to be two people for the foreseeable future.

What does this mean?

I ask myself, as my day goes on, "What would a perfect husband do?" If I am able to anwer that question, then I do that thing.

This is frequently NOT the response that comes first to mind for me. In fact, it is frequently NOT the response I would ever think of, much less choose to do.

What does this mean? It means that in my interactions with my wife I have, in large part, CHOSEN to be someone else. I make this choice because maintaining the peace in the household is of greater value to me than indulging my temporary need to "express myself."

Which leaves me with the question: can a man be two, and be happy?

Can a man be a perfect expression of what God has made him to be if he must deliberately set himself aside for a good portion of his life? Realizing that the story of Jesus Christ is a story of sacrifice and of self-denial, does that justify sublimatin that which made perfectly in God's own image?

But, IF you can get to the point where the answers to any of those questions is "yes," then you still have to deal with if it's even possible to maintain for any length of time. Many men lead dual lives--most notably in the event of an extramarital affair. But, given that the essence of the duality is AWAY from the home, I wonder if they ever have to deal with the schizophrenic nature of what I propose.

Regardless, this is the resolution, at least for the time being.

What does this have to do with wellness? Everything.

But, for now, let's just say that I'm talking about a Spiritual issue, and leave it at that.